Episode 12: Where Do We Begin with Stored Trauma? (Part 2) with Alex Howard

Listen to Episode 12 with Alex Howard →

When Trauma Work Makes You Worse

You're ready to heal. You find a therapist, sign up for the intensive workshop, and commit to processing your trauma. You're finally going to face what happened and move through it.

But instead of getting better, you feel worse. More anxious, more triggered, more overwhelmed. You can't sleep. You can't function. Everything feels like too much.

Here's what nobody told you: you can't process stored trauma without stabilizing your nervous system first.

I learned this the hard way in my clinical work. People would try to dive into their trauma and get worse, not better.

Alex Howard returns for part two of our stored trauma discussion. We explore why the order of healing matters and what happens when you skip the stabilization phase.

The Stabilization Requirement

Before you address the biological aspect of trauma, your nervous system needs stability. Without it, trauma work overwhelms you. You cross your critical line too fast.

My patients taught me this. They'd come in ready to process everything immediately, eager to do the deep work and get it over with. But their bodies weren't ready. They needed stabilization first.

Think about it biologically. Trauma processing requires nervous system capacity. You need enough regulation to touch the material without collapsing into overwhelm. You need enough safety to stay present with difficult emotions. You need enough resilience to metabolize what comes up.

When you try to process trauma without adequate capacity, you retraumatize yourself. You activate your nervous system beyond what it can handle. You prove to your body that the work isn't safe, and your system shuts down even more.

This is why stabilization isn't optional but foundational. It's not a phase you can rush through to get to the "real work." It is the real work.

Why People Skip This Step

Everyone wants to get to the processing quickly. Stabilization feels too slow, too basic, and not dramatic enough. You want breakthrough, not small shifts in daily regulation.

I understand this impulse. You've been suffering for years. You're ready to be done with trauma. You want the big cathartic release that changes everything.

But your nervous system doesn't work that way. It needs evidence of safety accumulated over time. It needs repeated experiences of regulation before it trusts that deeper processing is safe. It needs capacity built gradually, not forced suddenly.

Skipping stabilization keeps you stuck longer because you keep trying to process before you're ready, you retraumatize yourself with premature work, your nervous system learns that healing isn't safe, you stay in overwhelm without adequate support, and you cycle between activation and collapse.

The fastest path to healing goes through stabilization first. Not around it.

What Nervous System Stabilization Actually Looks Like

Stabilization isn't dramatic. It's micro-moments of safety repeated consistently. Small shifts in regulation practiced daily. Building capacity before demanding expansion.

This includes learning to track sensation in your body without overwhelm, practicing nervous system regulation tools that work for you, creating enough safety for your system to rest, building resilience through small doses of activation, and establishing support before touching difficult material.

It's not about never feeling activated but about increasing your capacity to return to regulation. It's not about avoiding triggers but about building the resources to handle them when they arise.

What stabilization creates is a wider window of tolerance for difficult emotions, better ability to self-regulate when triggered, more capacity to stay present with hard things, a nervous system that trusts you to protect it, and the foundation required for deeper trauma processing.

Once your nervous system is stable, you can address deeper layers. Your cells can handle the work. Your mitochondria can support the process. Your biology has the resources required for healing.

Where to Actually Begin

Start with what creates stability for your body, not what you think should work or what worked for someone else, but what your nervous system actually responds to.

For some people, that's breathwork and vagal toning. For others, it's movement and somatic practices. Some need connection and co-regulation. Others need solitude and internal resources first.

The Biology of Trauma® approach recognizes that stabilization is individual. Your nervous system has its own requirements, its own timeline, and its own path to safety.

The order matters universally though. Safety comes before processing. Support comes before expansion. This isn't optional but how your biology works.

You can't skip phases and expect healing. You can't force your nervous system past its capacity. You can't trauma-process your way out of dysregulation when you haven't built stability first.

This Episode Is For:

✓ People who've tried trauma work that made them feel worse 

✓ Anyone wondering where to actually start with healing 

✓ Those who keep getting overwhelmed in therapy or workshops 

✓ Practitioners whose clients get activated when processing too soon 

✓ Anyone who's been told to "just process" without adequate preparation 

✓ People ready to understand why the order of healing matters

What You'll Learn

Listen to understand why stabilizing your nervous system must come first. Discover how to know when you're ready for deeper work. Learn what nervous system stabilization actually looks like in practice.

Your healing has an order. Respect it, and the deeper work becomes possible.

Listen to Episode 12 with Alex Howard →

Disclaimer

This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The information shared reflects my clinical expertise and research, but every person's biology and healing journey is unique. Always consult with qualified healthcare providers before making changes to your treatment plan or starting new interventions. If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact emergency services or a crisis helpline immediately.

Join the Conversation

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this episode. What resonated with you? What questions came up?

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