What Happens When You Release Suppressed Emotions? Why Feeling Safe Eases Pain, with Dr. Howard Schubiner (Part 2)
When you release suppressed emotions in a setting that feels safe, the body moves out of a danger state. People describe a lightness, less tension in the chest and stomach, and deeper breaths, and pain that the nervous system was holding as protection can begin to ease.
Many people with chronic pain have held emotions down for decades. Some fear they will drown if they let those feelings in. Others have buried them so deeply they no longer know they are there, and yet those stored emotions keep shaping their biology. In the Biology of Trauma® framework, this is one of the clearest places stored trauma shows up in the body.
Dr. Howard Schubiner is an internist and a Clinical Professor at the Michigan State University College of Human Medicine, and the author of Unlearn Your Pain. He co-developed Emotional Awareness and Expression Therapy, and he was an early mentor to Dr. Aimie.
This is Part 2 of a two-part conversation. Part 1, Can Emotional Pain Cause Physical Pain?, explains why the brain turns on pain for danger.
Emotions that were never safe to feel get stored, and they keep the body in a danger state. When people approach those emotions with safety and compassion, sadness can move into compassion and anger can be expressed and let go, and the body follows with lightness and deeper breathing. Even when capacity is very low, the work can start in the imagination or with one small movement.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU RELEASE SUPPRESSED EMOTIONS?
The body moves from a place of danger toward a place of safety. Dr. Schubiner describes the shift he sees: a lightness, an unburdening, less weight on the shoulders, less tension in the chest and stomach, and deeper breaths.
The emotions he works with most are fear, anger, guilt, and sadness and grief. Fear usually comes up first for people who have been hurt. In his view, fear is a warning signal that keeps the body locked in protection, and over time it can show up as anxiety, fatigue and pain.
The aim is to approach painful memories without reliving them. Dr. Schubiner calls this memory reconsolidation: when a memory is recalled with new emotions, sadness can move into compassion, and anger can be expressed and let go. He links the shift to less sympathetic activity and more parasympathetic activity.
Memory reconsolidation: the process by which a recalled memory is updated before it is stored again, so the emotions attached to it can change.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN THAT NEUROPLASTIC SYMPTOMS ARE REVERSIBLE?
It means symptoms the nervous system has learned can be unlearned. Dr. Schubiner calls these symptoms neuroplastic: real, not imaginary, and changeable.
He avoids labels like "autonomic dysregulation" because people hear them as a verdict that something is permanently wrong with their body. He wants people to know that their symptoms are real and that it is not their fault.
Dr. Aimie frames it through the nervous system: it is responding to the data and information it receives. Given enough time, a response becomes the default. When the data changes, the response can change too.
Neuroplastic symptoms: symptoms such as pain, fatigue or anxiety that come from learned patterns in the nervous system. Because they were learned, they can be unlearned.
HOW DO YOU MAKE IT SAFE TO FEEL EMOTIONS YOU HAVE BURIED FOR DECADES?
It starts with care. Dr. Schubiner says the first step is a space that feels loving and caring, because no one approaches what they have avoided for decades without feeling safe.
Many people who carry trauma learned to care for others first, to be praised or to avoid conflict, and rarely turned that care toward themselves. Dr. Schubiner models compassion so people can feel it and begin to offer it to themselves. Self-compassion gives people enough courage to approach their emotions, and it gives those emotions an ending.
HOW CAN COMPASSION, CURIOSITY AND CALM CHANGE PAIN?
They answer the question the body is asking. In Dr. Schubiner's view, pain, fatigue or anxiety arrive as a signal with a question attached: are you okay?
When the answer is panic, the signal gets louder. When the answer is compassion, curiosity or calm, the body receives new data that it is okay. He describes a woman with back pain who placed her hand on her back with compassion, and the pain eased.
Action sends the same message: getting up and moving, listening to music, dancing, or playing a game with your children. Each one tells the body it is safe enough to stand down.
WHERE DO YOU START WHEN CAPACITY IS VERY LOW?
Start with understanding, then begin in the imagination. Dr. Schubiner first helps people understand why their symptoms developed and what they are, so the symptoms make sense and change feels possible.
From there, he trains the brain gently. A person who cannot walk or eat on their own can begin by imagining walking, eating or dancing, with a sense of safety and joy. Then comes a very small movement. One woman he describes was bedridden with pain everywhere. She loved to dance, so she started by dancing with one finger, then two, then her hands. Her recovery took two years.
The training works the way gentle animal training does: a consistent message, repeated with patience and kindness, until the new response becomes the default.
Capacity: how much demand the nervous system can meet before it shifts into protection. When demand outpaces capacity, the nervous system crosses its critical line of overwhelm.
Key Takeaways
Releasing suppressed emotions in safety moves the body from a danger state toward a safe state.
Dr. Schubiner sees lightness, less tension and deeper breathing when long-held emotions are expressed.
Fear is a warning signal, and it usually comes up first for people who have been hurt.
Memories can change: recalled with new emotions, sadness can move into compassion and anger can be let go.
Neuroplastic symptoms are real, learned and reversible.
The nervous system responds to the data it receives, so new data can change the response.
Self-compassion gives people the courage to approach emotions they have avoided.
Compassion, curiosity and calm answer the body's question: am I okay?
When capacity is very low, the work can start in the imagination or with one small movement.
Notable Quotes
"Neuroplastic are neural circuits that have been learned, and by definition can be unlearned." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"The nervous system is simply responding to the data that's coming into it, and we can change the data, which then allows the response to change." ~ Dr. Aimie Apigian
"The fear is a warning signal. The brain is saying, 'You're in danger. Run, hide, fight.'" ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"It turns out that memory is always changing. When we talk about emotional work, we're talking about memory reconsolidation." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"What changes in the body is there's a lightness, there's an unburdening, the weight on their shoulders is less… and they can take deeper breaths." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"It's about love, I think. It's about creating a space that's loving and caring." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"Sadness turns right into compassion. Anger gets expressed, and you let it go." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"You can show the brain that you're okay by compassion, by calm, by curiosity." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
"We get to work with a nervous system that is so adaptable that we can teach it how to dance again by starting with finger dancing." ~ Dr. Aimie Apigian
"If you never ask the question if your symptoms are neuroplastic or not, you're potentially missing an opportunity for true recovery." ~ Dr. Howard Schubiner
Episode Takeaway
Dr. Schubiner was one of my early mentors, so this conversation meant a great deal to me. In Part 1, we talked about why pain can appear without an injury. In this episode, I wanted to go where so many of you are stuck: the emotions you have held down for years, sometimes decades.
I hear two fears again and again. Some of you are afraid that if you open the floodgates, you will drown. Others have buried those emotions so deeply that you are not even aware they are there. Both make sense. And in both cases, those emotions are still shaping your biology.
What I most want you to hold from this episode is this: emotions that were never safe to feel get stored, and what gets stored creates a biology of trauma. The body stays in a feedback loop of protection until the nervous system receives new data that it is now safe.
Dr. Schubiner describes what happens when that new data arrives. Someone finally expresses an emotion they have carried for decades, and the body changes. There is lightness. The weight on the shoulders eases, and the chest and stomach soften. People take deeper breaths. Sadness moves into compassion. Anger is expressed and let go.
That shift comes from safety. His first tool is a space that feels loving and caring, and the compassion he models for his patients becomes the compassion they learn to offer themselves. I see the same thing: so many of us learned to care for everyone else first and never turned that care inward.
I also appreciated his answer for those of you whose capacity is very low. If you are bedbound, or so fatigued that eating takes everything you have, you can still begin. You can start in your imagination. You can start with one finger. The woman he describes began by dancing with one finger, and two years later she had recovered. Your nervous system is that adaptable.
When Dr. Schubiner talks about the brain, I hear the part of us that scans for danger below conscious thought: our nervous system, responding to the data it receives. That is why compassion, curiosity and calm matter so much. They are new data. Each time you meet pain or fear with "I am okay," you answer the question your body has been asking.
In the Biology of Trauma® framework, we work in an order: safety first, then building capacity, then opening what has been stored. This episode is a picture of why that order matters. Emotions can only be released when the body feels safe enough to let them move, and capacity is what makes that safety possible.
If you want to see your own patterns of stored trauma, the 2-Minute Assessment for Stored Trauma will help you see which patterns are most active in your body. And when you are ready to build the safety and capacity this work depends on, the Foundational Journey is where that work begins.
Frequently Asked Questions
What happens when you release suppressed emotions?
The body moves out of a danger state. Dr. Howard Schubiner describes a lightness and an unburdening, with less tension in the chest and stomach and deeper breathing.
Can suppressed emotions cause chronic pain?
In Dr. Schubiner's experience, fear held for years can show up as anxiety, fatigue and pain. When those emotions are approached safely, the body can move toward safety and the symptoms can change.
Is it safe to let out emotions I have held in for years?
It becomes safe when the setting feels caring and the pace fits your capacity. Dr. Schubiner starts with compassion, and he says emotions have an ending: sadness turns into compassion, and anger is expressed and let go.
What is memory reconsolidation?
It is the process by which a recalled memory is updated before it is stored again. Dr. Schubiner uses it to help people approach painful memories without reliving them, so the emotions attached to those memories can change.
Can self-compassion reduce pain?
Dr. Schubiner has seen it help. He describes a woman with back pain who placed a hand on her back with compassion, and the pain eased.
How do you start healing when you are bedridden with pain or fatigue?
You can start in the imagination. Dr. Schubiner has people imagine walking, eating or dancing with a sense of safety and joy, then add very small movements, such as dancing with one finger.
How long does it take to unlearn chronic pain?
It varies. Dr. Schubiner describes people with severe pain or fatigue who fully recovered, including one woman whose recovery took two years.
In This Episode
01:14 Neuroplastic means reversible: the nervous system isn't broken
04:31 What changes in the body when stored emotions are expressed
07:15 When emotions feel too big, or are buried too deep
10:37 Compassion, curiosity and calm: showing the brain you're okay
13:49 Where to start when capacity is very low
18:23 Training the nervous system with patience
20:45 Dr. Schubiner's new book
22:29 Outro and the stored emotions assessment
Resources and Guides
Take the free 2-Minute Assessment for Stored Trauma. See which patterns of stored trauma are most active in your body. 2-Minute Assessment for Stored Trauma
Get The Biology of Trauma book. Chapter 3, "Understanding Our Critical Line: Neuroception, Capacity & The Gap," explains how the nervous system weighs capacity against demand, the ground this episode stands on when capacity is very low.
Unlearn Your Pain: The Science of Recovering from Chronic Pain, Fatigue, Anxiety, and Depression by Dr. Howard Schubiner.
Your Host
Dr. Aimie Apigian, MD, MS, MPH is a double board-certified physician in preventive medicine and addiction medicine with master's degrees in biochemistry and public health. She is the author of The Biology of Trauma, the founder of Trauma Healing Accelerated, and the creator of the Biology of Trauma® framework. She guides self-help individuals and trains practitioners in safely opening up stored trauma that has become biology. Her work came out of her own experience of being a physician with stored trauma she did not recognize as trauma.
About the Guest
Dr. Howard Schubiner is an internist and a Clinical Professor at the Michigan State University College of Human Medicine, and has authored more than 100 publications in scientific journals and books. With colleagues including Dr. Mark Lumley, he developed Emotional Awareness and Expression Therapy, and he helped develop Pain Reprocessing Therapy, both tested in randomized controlled trials. He sees patients virtually through Cormendi Health. His newest book is Unlearn Your Pain: The Science of Recovering from Chronic Pain, Fatigue, Anxiety, and Depression.
Related Episodes
Can Emotional Pain Cause Physical Pain? Why the Brain Turns On Pain for Danger, with Dr. Howard Schubiner (Part 1). For the listener who wants to start at the beginning: why the brain turns on pain for danger, and why emotional danger counts.
Episode 91: The Neuroscience of Chronic Pain: How Our Brain Predicts And Creates A Biology of Pain with Dr. Howard Schubiner. For the listener who wants the neuroscience: how the brain predicts pain and makes it habitual.
Episode 166: The Body Can't Heal Pain It Still Perceives as a Threat. For the listener whose capacity is low: the critical line of overwhelm and the five nervous system skills that build capacity.
Research
Lumley MA, Schubiner H, et al. Emotional awareness and expression therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and education for fibromyalgia: a cluster-randomized controlled trial. Pain. 2017;158(12):2354-2363. The therapy Dr. Schubiner co-developed. It did not beat education on pain severity, and more people reached a 50% pain reduction than with CBT (22.5% vs 8.3%).
Ashar YK, et al. Pain reprocessing therapy vs placebo and usual care for patients with chronic back pain: 5-year follow-up of a randomized clinical trial. JAMA Psychiatry. 2025;82(10):1049-1051. The five-year follow-up of the pain reprocessing therapy trial Dr. Schubiner co-authored: 55% of the treatment group were pain-free, against 26% for placebo and 36% for usual care.
Transcript
Disclaimer
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